New Year, New Me: Your Guide to Spiritual Molting

It's September, meaning that the new year is just moments away! Get ready to make new year's resolutions and then abandon them like the garbage person you are using these simple tips.

What is spiritual molting? Molting is the process in which snakes shed their skin. (See post "Snake Skin?" for a more in-depth explanation of this physical process). Spiritually, one can shed their negative attributes in order to be their best self. Get rid of any shred of personality you have and just be a likeable mass of nothing because you want to fit in!

1. Sugar scrubs.
It's not about the physical scrub, but what it represents. This upcoming year, use sugar scrubs to not only exfoliate, but to rub away anything that makes you different or unique!

2. Therapy.
Stop posting long paragraphs about your mental state on FaceBook and invest in some real help. In all seriousness, therapy can be a great way to work on your mental health and become the best version of you, you can be.

3. Harry Potter movie marathon.
Since this would take a full day, this is the perfect remedy for when you want to forget your own name!

4. Drink water.
What would a list of self-help tips be without water? Fulfill your dreams of becoming a stock photo model and take a sip of that sweet, sweet dihydrogen monoxide.

5. Get bitten by a snake.
Add some spice into your life! Be fun! Be adventurous! But make sure to use protection!

Best of luck turning into your best self this year. Let me know how spiritual molting work for you by shouting into the void and hoping your vibes reach me :)

Peace, love, molting snakes,
-MAD

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